YOU’RE ALWAYS BEGINNING

the wisdom of FIONA LAWRIE (a DEDICATIOn)

Fiona (Fi) was one of my first clients. She was also one my dearest and most valued. She came for sessions regularly and over the many years we worked together we surely covered it all. From the residual grief of her father’s passing and the burning resentment due to the lost legal battle (he died of asbestosis) to the guilt she felt for being a single mum and scrolling on her phone when she should’ve been hanging out with her son. We spent many sessions tapping in to select the best suppliers, producers and even factory sites for her many entrepreneurial business ventures. We covered the painful blows of dating unavailable men who couldn’t make the effort to pick her up from the airport. And finally, I walked with her on every step of her cancer journey.

Fiona was a beautiful soul inside and out. In fact, she was stunning. Like any good Taurean, she loved the finer things in life – travelling, wining, dining, and fashion. She was stylish as well as beautiful.

But she was also funny – irreverently funny. We got along well. She often told me how much she appreciated my ability to laugh at her black humour. I still remember the session when she jokingly admitted that she felt guilty for preferring to watch Married at First Sight instead of researching cancer treatments. A joke she couldn’t tell any of her friends or family. She saw the humour in the folly of life, just as I did. And she was grateful that I could laugh at it too.

Fi was always open-minded and interested in the ‘woo woo’ stuff. We once made a pact that when she passed, she’d try to contact me from the other side so she could try out her ghostly skills and I could try out my psychic skills. That’s how we rolled.

In one of our sessions dealing with the stress and pressure she felt to make her business work, to be the perfect mother and to get the illusive romantic relationship right, her body wanted her to understand the meaning of the Tarot Card “The Fool.”

The Fool is all about new beginnings, adventures and potential. When you’re about to start a journey and ‘step out’ into the unknown. When you don’t know where you’re going and what will happen, but you need to take a ‘leap of faith’ and trust the Universe.

Fi was quite taken with this message. She absolutely loved it. She confided that the archetype of The Fool had become somewhat of a ‘mentor,’ helping her to navigate the myriad of difficult decisions she had to make. Before she’d befriended The Fool the thought of the unknown had terrified her and yet in one powerful a-ha moment of connection, she understood that the unknown was simply a natural part of the journey of life and she had the tools (faith and trust) to approach it.

For me, this was such a powerful example of the profound guidance that can come to you in Energy Coaching sessions. Kinesiology testing had pin-pointed the exact message Fi needed to hear to help her, to provide a guiding light to protect and support her on her path.

“I feel calm and open to what is coming next.”

"I consider myself an 'open minded sceptic' when it comes to therapies but I've been seeing Belinda for 4 years now and the changes in my mind set, habits and attitude are measurable.  My self worth, motivation and the way I live and love have turned around and I feel calm and open to what is coming next. I used to feel constantly overwhelmed, anxious and frustrated. Since I've been seeing Belinda I feel calm, like I'm able to listen to my body, listen, identify and trust my instinct and make the right decisions for me.  I always feel pumped and on the right track after a visit to Belinda."

—Fiona

👆 A testimonial Fi wrote for me in the early days. (FYI. I only re-read this after I’d written this article)

#we_are_wisdom

The last time I saw Fi was a house call. Her stylishly decorated loungeroom had been transformed into a palliative care room. I sat by her bed, and we did a session. We used Kinesiology testing to confirm the contents of the goodbye letter to her 13-year-old son.

This session was life-changing for me as a therapist. I had never felt so privileged to be part of someone’s journey as I did that day. Truthfully, I had been nervous about how I could possibly help her prepare for her transition, but I ended up watching in awe as Fi prepared for her passing with courage, dignity, grace and above all, humour.

I recalled all the sessions we’d done in the years leading up to that moment. The intention of each session had predominantly been about healing the cancer. But you can never be assured of the outcome of your healing efforts. When and if the healing happens is up to the Divine. All you can do it listen to your inner guidance, and then like The Fool, step out with courage and keep the faith.

What I realised was that the sessions had perfectly prepared her for this moment. Fi’s body had taken us on a journey of detaching from drama, releasing resentments, finding forgiveness, owning her innate beauty and wisdom and ultimately finding a deep inner peace. In every session, the guidance of her higher wisdom had been perfect. It was all exactly what she needed, whether she was to heal from Cancer or die from it. Her innate healing wisdom had supported and guided her, preparing her for whatever outcome awaited.

Despite her frailty (and much to the annoyance of her mother) Fi clambered out of bed to insist on making make me a cup of tea.

As I watched her make the tea, I noticed it.

There on her fridge was an A4 colour poster of the tarot card, The Fool.

I felt a pang of sadness at that time. The symbology of ‘new beginnings’ seemed a little out of place.

But then I realised that this was not the case at all.

Where there’s an ending there’s a beginning. That’s life. In fact, you’re always beginning. Fi was about to embark on a new beginning, a new adventure. It was the ultimate unknown. She had no idea what to expect. But she was ready to take a leap of faith.

The Fool had prepared her well.